Stuck in Neutral: How to Shift Your Life Back Into Drive

by Megan Stubbs

It is all too easy to find yourself falling into the monotony of a life rut. From not feeling great about the way you look to feeling unaccomplished at work, these feelings are common for everyone. Here are five tips to help you get your groove back and level you back up to feeling spectacular and confident.

Believe in Yourself

First and foremost, trust in yourself. Women are especially susceptible to the criticisms of society and friends and often compare themselves to others. This can have a detrimental affect on our self-esteem and make us wonder if we are ‘enough.’ Are we smart enough? Are we good enough? Are we pretty enough? Yes, we are! Take some time to realize how amazing you are. Revel in your accomplishments and appreciate what makes you, you. Continually loving yourself creates a great baseline for you to reach new heights.

Do Good for Others

Have you ever been in line to purchase a coffee and when it came time for payment, you were told that the person ahead of you picked up your tab? How did that make you feel? It probably turned your otherwise regular Tuesday into a special day with the hope of something more. Little acts of kindness are the perfect way to turn an ordinary blah day into one that has a spark of something magical. Be that magic for someone else! Often when we do a good deed for others we feel better about ourselves and we get to help others at the same time.

Do Something New

Are your friends always talking about their spin class? Have you pinned 100 recipes on Pinterest and never tried one? Has your bed been in the same place in your room since you moved in? Try some new things! This is one of the easiest things that you can do to shake yourself out of your rut. Challenge yourself and take some risks!

Create Goals

Making lists and checking them off can be a pleasure in and of itself. There is a great sense of accomplishment in reaching a goal and knowing that it is completed. This is an awesome confidence booster because you can visually see things that you have put forth to be completed and then see when they are done! If goal writing is new for you, start with something small. They don’t have to be massive goals like master the Japanese language by month’s end, but rather something simple such as washing all dishes in sink the before going to bed.


Often overlooked yet so vitally important to a balanced life is rest. Yes, new classes and goal setting and good deeds are great, but so is a relaxed mind. You can even incorporate rest as one of your goals. When your mind is able to relax, you can see things more clearly and better assess what changes if any, need to happen in your life. With less stress, you can feel more in control of your life and happier overall.

So if you’re feeling stuck, fear not. Every journey starts with a single step and this is no different. Try to incorporate some of these tips into your life and see if your life starts to change. You can do it, I believe in you! Let me know if you have any different tips to help level up your life!

“There is no force equal to a woman determined to rise.” –W.E.B. Debois

Megan Stubbs

Dr. Megan Stubbs is a Sexologist, the job you never saw on career day. For insightful tips or a good laugh, find her on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram and



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